When Things Don’t Go As Planned

The ultimate resistance to change is probably getting ‘what you thought it would be like,’ out of your head. And when I say, ‘what you thought it would be like,’ I mean your expectations. 

I GOT LEMONS AND DIDN’T LIKE IT

Let me tell you what happened to me. My husband, Dante, and I got some encouraging news that we both accepted, in our minds, as our only reality. We made plans, prepared, and moved on.

Now things were going great up until we received more details. And these details rocked things. At the moment, it felt like it shook everything. Post-haste the situation changed, and so did our attitudes. 

I can’t speak for Dante, but I can speak for myself and say that I got angry. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. Why? Because I was disappointed. 

So, I blew it off, like it is what it is, and went to bed. But after sleeping on things and waking up feeling worse, I knew I had to do something. So, I asked my family to pray for me. They did. Then I prayed. I told God all my thoughts. Yes, all of them. Then less than an hour later, with my emotions settled and not of much of anything being on my mind, I thought, the greatest resistance to change is probably getting out of your head what you thought it would be. I thought ooh, this is great. Because it was similar to this note, I’d journaled a few days before: sometimes, the greatest resistance you’ll face is internal. 

GETTING MY MIND AWAY FROM WHAT I PLANNED

The obvious harmony in my thoughts made me think about how to use it as content for your fav life advice brand, The Smoking Prophet. But then mid-thought my mind paused. My words hit me on a more personal level. And I stopped thinking about using this life quote for anyone else other than myself because it was for me.

I thought about what I’d been upset over and became aware that my struggle was internal. More than anything else, I was emotionally invested in what I thought things would be. And this was toxic because it stopped me from accepting my new reality (which, by the way, was not bad at all),

I was stuck. 

My initial expectation made me a prisoner in my mind, heart, and emotions until God took a moment of peace to help me process things and snap out of it. 

REFLECTION TIME

But hey, that’s my story, so let’s make this more personal to you. Take a moment to think about the last time you were disappointed. Oh, here’s a good one, what about the last time you had a tough time with change. Thinking back to those moments, what change or disappointment did you face? And what was your initial expectation? Did you eventually stop resisting the change? If so, how? And how long did it take for you to become flexible? Is it possible that you would have adjusted better if you’d pushed your initial expectations out of your head and embraced your present reality? 

Maybe so, but only you and God knows. Either way, stop reeling over what you planned, expected, or thought things would be. Be present at this moment, and move forward.

Featured Photo Credit: Lamar T. Harvey with Lundizign